Hankering...

Ever been hungry for something but you're not sure exactly what IT is. Like you won't know what you really wanna eat until someone says IT or until you see It. Then you realize what IT is! And upon the great revelation of IT's identify, you realize you mustn't have anything else but IT now, and you mean RIGHT now! You go insane and can't concentrate on anything else until you have the tender, juicy, morsel of IT in your mouth, enjoying the delectable succulence, thanking the Lord, Almighty God for the moment He has given you in the form of IT? Have you? Oh good! Me too! LOL

I'm experiencing that now!

I didn't bring in to work lunch today, as I usually do. I’m not sure what I want. So of course, thus begins the hour-long (sometimes longer) decision making process of what I want to eat. Which, unfortunately involves anyone near or in my office = Stephanie. She's used to this routine. She makes a suggestion, I whine and say no, another suggestion, I whine and answer maybe, and so on until we hit the nail on the head. Today, I hit it with the quickness.

Me: Hmmm....I think I want Dozo! I haven't had that in a while
Stephanie: NO! YOU HAVEN'T HAD DOZO IN A LONG TIME!
Ivy: I think I need it.
Stephanie: I think you need it.

Dozo is IT!

I’m excited, ya’ll. I go into my drawer and get the menu. All the while wiping the drool from my chin, ignoring the hunger stabs associated with the anticipation of the most delicious meal in the world. I NEED SHU MAI AND A CALIFORNIA ROLL PRONTO! STAT! CODE ORANGE!!

Of course, I dialed the wrong number twice and get a recording saying the number isn't in service. Now I’m annoyed because I can't get to Dozo quick enough and in my excitement, I keep mis-dialing.

Upon careful dial No. 3, I hear a familiar voice. Although, it's changed since I heard it two seconds ago! Now it sounds like an evil, satan, sadistic, mocking, trickery voice! And it's snarling something unimaginable! Almost unintelligible!

Evil Satan Sadistic Mocking Trickery Voice: The number you have dialed is not in service. Please be sure you have the right number in mind and have dialed it correctly. This is a recording.

ARE YOU FRIKKIN' KIDDING ME!! OMG!! PANIC AT THE DISCO!!!!

This surely can't be! I know it can't be! IT JUST AIN'T! DOZO IS NOT CLOSED!!

Calmly, I Gooooooogle Dozo's sister restaurant because I need answers. Ring, ring, ring....

Japanese Man: Miso Restaurant
Petrified Hungry Ivy: Hi. Is Dozo closed?
Japanese Man: Yes, we are
Petrified Hungry Breathless Shell of Ivy: It's closed?
Japanese Man: Yes
Shadow of a withered soul f/k/a Ivy: Ok, thanks. (click)

YUP! Heard it with my own two ears! Dozo gone, ya'll! I will never enjoy a steaming bowl of Curry or ANY Ramen again. There is not a Dumpling Ramen with extra vegetables to be had! Hey Steph, you want a Mango Salsa Shrimp Roll? Yeah? Sorry Pumpkin Spice. You will never have that sweet mango salsa juice run across your lips in life, EVER!

LORD JESUS! SOS! SAVE OUR SOULS PLEASE!!!!

It's over, my friends! Therefore, I would like you to run into your kitchen, grab your chopsticks and hold them in your left hand. Please place your right hand over heart, as we acknowledge the passing of Dozo Japanese Restaurant. Let's have a 10 minute silence, in commemoration of the time it takes for your order to be ready. Please quietly say with me, "You come pick up in ten minutes"!

They were happy times. Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today...

Well, C'est la vie!


But wait, ya'll! I STILL AIN'T GOT NO DANG LUNCH MAN!!!!!!!!!