Heaven help me.....
Yesterday, I ran into Walmart to get something small to satisfy my sweet tooth*. As I'm approaching, I can hear the Bell Ringer standing outside talking LOUDLY on his cell phone. Yes, he's on the phone on a personal call while ring-a-ling-a-linging his Salvation Army bell, wearing his red apron and Santa hat OVER his backwards baseball cap. LOL That alone is a blog in itself. He was talking sooo loud that I could hear the whole conversation over his bell. Needless to say, the first parts of what I heart were so comical and I started walking slower to hear more...
Salvation Army Bell Ringer: "Nah, girl. I can't come by there right now. I'm at a charity event. Gonna be here for a few more hours raising funds. I'll call you when I get in the car...."
I laughed to myself. I, of course, went to put my change in the red bucket thing. After I threw it in, he thanked me:
Salvation Army Bell Ringer: Thanks you so much Ma'am...but would you like to donate some of your time.
Ivy, knowing what's about to go down: I'm Sorry?
Bell-Ringing, Santa-hat Wearing Pimp: I would appreciate if you would donate some of your time to my personal cause..(But wait, it gets better)...Tax-free, girl! *winking*
I just walked away, cracking up!! That was a really, really good one!!! I got a wink and all!!! So I'm standing in line, realizing that I'm gonna have to walk by him again. I was actually amused to see what he would say this time! But when I walk through the doors, he was on the phone AGAIN!!!
Soon-To-Be-Unemployed Salvation Army Bell Ringer: "Hey sweetheart. This is (his name). I've been trying to call you all day, sugar. What's up with that? I'm at a charity event now so I'll call you when I get in the car. Aye, don't have me waiting all night. Trust me, I don't have to wait alone...."
Again, I say, why does this always happen to me? Someone please tell me why I continue to shop at Walmart? It never fails...
So look, clearly, this man is out of a job. Click here to help The Salvation Army recover the losses of hiring this moron.
*"something small to satisfy my sweet tooth" turned into ingredients to make a double chocolate cake with Chocolate Double Cream Frosting, apple fritters, caramel sauce, Breyers Vanilla Ice cream and two slices of cheesecake. LOL And in true Ivy form, I got all that and didn't even eat any of it. I made the cake last night and it's in the fridge untouched. Can I email you a piece?
Yesterday, I ran into Walmart to get something small to satisfy my sweet tooth*. As I'm approaching, I can hear the Bell Ringer standing outside talking LOUDLY on his cell phone. Yes, he's on the phone on a personal call while ring-a-ling-a-linging his Salvation Army bell, wearing his red apron and Santa hat OVER his backwards baseball cap. LOL That alone is a blog in itself. He was talking sooo loud that I could hear the whole conversation over his bell. Needless to say, the first parts of what I heart were so comical and I started walking slower to hear more...
Salvation Army Bell Ringer: "Nah, girl. I can't come by there right now. I'm at a charity event. Gonna be here for a few more hours raising funds. I'll call you when I get in the car...."
I laughed to myself. I, of course, went to put my change in the red bucket thing. After I threw it in, he thanked me:
Salvation Army Bell Ringer: Thanks you so much Ma'am...but would you like to donate some of your time.
Ivy, knowing what's about to go down: I'm Sorry?
Bell-Ringing, Santa-hat Wearing Pimp: I would appreciate if you would donate some of your time to my personal cause..(But wait, it gets better)...Tax-free, girl! *winking*
I just walked away, cracking up!! That was a really, really good one!!! I got a wink and all!!! So I'm standing in line, realizing that I'm gonna have to walk by him again. I was actually amused to see what he would say this time! But when I walk through the doors, he was on the phone AGAIN!!!
Soon-To-Be-Unemployed Salvation Army Bell Ringer: "Hey sweetheart. This is (his name). I've been trying to call you all day, sugar. What's up with that? I'm at a charity event now so I'll call you when I get in the car. Aye, don't have me waiting all night. Trust me, I don't have to wait alone...."
Again, I say, why does this always happen to me? Someone please tell me why I continue to shop at Walmart? It never fails...
So look, clearly, this man is out of a job. Click here to help The Salvation Army recover the losses of hiring this moron.
*"something small to satisfy my sweet tooth" turned into ingredients to make a double chocolate cake with Chocolate Double Cream Frosting, apple fritters, caramel sauce, Breyers Vanilla Ice cream and two slices of cheesecake. LOL And in true Ivy form, I got all that and didn't even eat any of it. I made the cake last night and it's in the fridge untouched. Can I email you a piece?
You have some funny stranger stories. They must target you. Speaking of target, maybe you should go there instead of Wal-Mart! Ha, ha, ha
ReplyDeletegood luck!
I'll take a piece! with a scoop of ice cream too!
ReplyDelete